Dr. Rick Marshall, Y U NO SANE?!

Matt Laurer: That was my guest Dr. Rick Marshall, whose book arrives in stores tomorrow.

Dr. Rick Marshall (offscreen): G*****m right it was!

Matt Laurer: You might want to look for it in the "I'm out of my freaking mind" department.
-- Land of the Lost (2009(

Lisa on Self Improvement

Self-improvement can be achieved, but not with a quick fix. It's a long, arduous journey of personal and spiritual discovery.
-- Lisa Simpson, "Bart's Inner Child" (1F05), The Simpsons (1993)

Bart's Chalkboard Gags of Season 1

From The Simpsons, Season One (1990):

I will not waste chalk. -- "Bart the Genius" (7G02), 1/14/1990

I will not skateboard in the halls. -- "Homer's Odessey" (7G03), 1/21/1990

I will not burp in class. -- "There's No Disgrace Like Home" (7G04), 1/28/1990

I will not instigate revolution. -- "Moaning Lisa" (7G06), 2/11/1990

I will not draw naked ladies in class. -- "The Call of the Simpsons" (7G09), 2/18/1990

I did not see Elvis. -- "The Telltale Head" (7G07), 2/25/1990

I will not call my teacher "hot cakes". -- "Homer's Night Out" (7G10), 3/25/1990

Garlic gum is not funny. -- "The Crepes of Wrath" (7G13), 4/15/1990

They are laughing at me, not with me. -- "Krusty Gets Busted" (7G12), 4/29/1990

I will not yell "fire" in a crowded classroom. -- "Some Enchanted Evening" (7G01), 5/13/1990